Thank you everyone who prayed for Taylor today!!! We just arrived home from his first day of round 2 of chemo and he did beautifully! He was so content, relaxed, and happy today during chemo which lasted from 7:15am until 6:00pm. He sat in his bed and played with his toys and even ate quite a bit throughout the day! When Taylor's happy...Momma's happy (and Grammy too since she comes with us most of the time). His counts are all very good today as well. He will not need blood until probably next week. His doctor examined his tumor this morning again and said that it appears to be getting softer and decreasing in size, just as expected. Praise the Lord! We love you all, Jen

Taylor and I just returned home from day 2 of round 2. He had an OK day today. The afternoon was a bit rough because he can't sleep very well in the PDH (Pediatric Day Hospital) where they get their chemo. There are a lot of little ones also getting chemo; therefore there is a lot of noise. One of the drugs he receives to prevent nausea also makes kids very irritable. When we got home he calmed down quite a bit. He's officially finished with all his chemo for this round now. Tomorrow we go in for his feeding tube. His surgery will be at about 11:00am. We will be spending the night on the inpatient floor so that they can show me how to run the pump during the night (which is when he will be fed for several hours at a time) and how to use the feeding tube in general. Please pray for him tomorrow! Thanks! We love you all, Jen

Hi All. Well Taylor got his feeding tube put in today. Jen says that everything went just fine with the surgery. Taylor is still resting and is apparently breathing a little shallow. They have had oxygen on him for about 6 hours now until he starts using his lungs to capacity again (it's not like you can tell a 2 year old to breath deeply a couple of times). Once he gets up and starts moving around, it is expected that his lungs will expand again properly. He is going to be receiving blood either tonight or tomorrow morning so that he is good for the holiday weekend. I am going to pick them up tomorrow morning at 9am. Hopefully they will be able to go home at that time. Please pray that everything continues to go well. Jen is tired (to be expected) but is doing very well. Thank you to those who have sent us Pediasure. It has been a great relief financially. God continues to astound me with the thoughtfulness and care that everyone has given us. Words cannot express the joy it brings to us. Thank You so much. I especially thank you all for your prayers. They are really working. We love you all, Matt

Happy 4th of July everyone! Taylor had a great night last night! He slept through the night and was very comfortable, even without pain medicine. This morning he ate some french toast and had plenty to drink. His G-tube is in and his doctor said it looks great (no redness, etc). He is in good spirits and we will be going home later this morning. Thank you all for your prayers! Now we can rest and know that he is going to be getting proper nutrition, a full belly each day, and strength for his little body to endure the rest of his treatment in the months to come. We love you all, Jen

Just wanted to write a quick note. It is now 4am and I just got home. Taylor has been admitted to the hospital again. It looks like he will be going in every 2nd week of the Chemo cycle (at least while he is getting the powerful drugs). He was running a fever of about 101.2 so we called the doctor and he told us to bring him in. Once we got there was no sign of the fever at all. They decided to do blood anyway and found that his WBC is at 0.2. That is what made them decide to admit him. Jen and Taylor have their own room for now due to Taylor being in "isolation". He has the sniffles and was coughing earlier. They are going to do a culture to rule out anything contagious. Once I find out more I will update this page. Thanx all for your prayers.

Hi everyone. Great news, still no fever. Taylor's blood counts are still at the bottom and he is developing mouth sores. Despite all this, he is doing very well and eating great. They are giving him food through the stomach tube at night while he is sleeping and he eats through his mouth during the day. He and Jen are both getting good nights sleep and he is taking naps during the day like normal. He is also playing in the play room alot. They are still in the isolation room but not in isolation. That only means that they don't have to have a room-mate. The doctors keep coming in from the sarcoma team to look at and feel his leg in complete delight. The doctors are smiling telling us that we have every reason to be very pleased with the progress. God is really great.

It is amazing. I have been on missions trips around the world and have seen God work in many different ways. But, I have never seen him more prevalant than within my own home within the last few weeks. Praise God. Thanx again for all your prayers and your gifts.

Hi everyone, it's Jen again. Taylor is doing well for having no white blood cells in his little body! He'll be at 0.0 for a few more days they tell us. Then, as with the last cycle, his counts will rise by the weekend and we'll be home then or soon after. He still has no fever and he's in fairly good spirits. They gave him a small dose of dilaudid (morphine) today for his mouth sores. Dr. Wexler came in to see us this afternoon. He said that Taylor looks great and is doing very well as far as weathering the storms of massive chemotherapy. He also said that his tumor continues to respond just as he expects and that we will soon sit down and discuss his surgery.

Every once in a while I look out his hospital room window and see all the bustle on the busy streets below. When we're here at MSK it can sometimes feel like the world is going on without us. Within these walls is a very different world. I feel comfortable now here among other parents with children who are also fighting cancer. In some way I feel like I'm lending a hand in the cause to get Taylor better and helping things along. Taylor and I have been meeting many other children and their parents. Many of these parents have a lot of bitterness in their hearts in regards to their child's illness. Please pray for Matt and I as we are often given the opportunity to share our faith. Life...when it's going wonderfully...is hopeless without the Lord. I can't imagine doing this without Him! He IS our hope and peace! We love you all, Jen

Hello, it's Jen. Taylor has been dealing with fever and mouth sores the past couple of days. It's very normal for neutropenic (low blood count) week. The Dilaudid pretty much keeps him comfortable though. He is still not himself. He says "NO" to anyone who comes near him or asks him a question. He doesn't trust anyone and he thinks everyone is out to hurt him...even the clowns who visit each week! The nurses say that is normal for a child his age going through this. It's a 2 year old thing as well. He is adjusting slowly to his new life. We wish we could explain to him that this is only for 10 months and not the rest of his life! There are good and bad aspects of his being too little to understand what's happening to him. I'm so happy he won't remember any of this as he grows older! He knows he has a boo boo in his leg and that the doctors and nurses are helping him get better. It breaks our hearts to see our little angel scared, sick, and in pain. We just wish we could take it all away from him. He is a strong little boy and very, very stubborn so we just know he'll fight this all the way! I guess his being half Dutch and half German is going to come in handy! Thanks for your prayers everyone. Thank you also to those who have given us Pediasure.

Taylor says Hi to his play group pals Olivia S., Dylan, Lauren, Josh, and Olivia P. He misses you guys. We love you all, Jen

Hello everyone. It's Sunday evening and Taylor has been fever free for 24 hours now. His ANC has to be above .5 and he has to be fever free for 24 hour before they can discharge him home. We're hoping that his counts will go up now and that he'll be .5 by Tuesday. I went home last night and got a much needed full nights sleep. The house was so quiet! I'm so used to hearing his IV pumps beeping and running all day and night that the silence was almost loud. Taylor had a good time with Daddy though. They watched two NASCAR races together. Taylor has finally adjusted to his G tube and is comfortable with the rate that the feeds (pediasure) are going into his tummy. Until yesterday morning, he would vomit whenever he got even the slightest bit worked up and crying. They say that as time goes on that will happen much less frequently. Thanks again for those of you who gave us Pediasure! We won't need anymore for a little while. We recently found out that the company, whom the insurance company is using, is providing us with Taylor's home feeding pump and supplies will be sending us some on a regular basis.

Thank you for all your prayers! We love you all, Jen

Hi all. Just wanted to let everyone know that it looks like Jen and Taylor will be coming home tomorrow. He has not had a fever since Sat. night and his WBC has gone up to .5. Tues. it should skyrocket right up. He is still a little grumpy but I think he just wants to get out of there. Over the past 2 to 3 days as I have been holding him, I could not believe the difference in the tumor. It is really reducing in size by leaps and bounds. When I support him from underneath I have to try and figure out which leg is really his left one with the tumor in it. God is so great. Thank you everyone for your continued prayer.

Hello everyone, we're home again!!! Taylor is still not feeling great but he's home and his counts are on their way up. He's very tired and doesn't want to walk on his own yet, but he was that way last round when we returned home from MSK. He will begin to eat better in the next couple of days and regain some energy. His G-tube has worked well this round. It gave him a real boost in energy as far as fighting fever, fatigue, and mouth sores while he was admitted!

WE RECEIVED GREAT NEWS TODAY!!! Dr. Wexler thoroughly examined Taylor's tumor today. His last exam was a two weeks ago. Today, Dr. Wexler said he could no longer feel the tumor and it appears as though it has shrunk all the way down! The small soft mass that remains is just blood left from the torn muscle he sustained back in January! That blood should now slowly absorb or it will be removed during the surgery. He will continue on with his last two rounds before his surgery. During the surgery Dr. La Quaglia will remove the dead tissue that used to be the active tumor. We suspect that his surgery will be in September. We will let you know the exact date as soon as we find out for sure when it will be. God is awesome!!! Please continue to pray for Taylor's health as he bounces back from round two and prepares for round three next week. We love you all! Jen

Taylor had a great day at home today! He ate well and even played outside quite a bit. I think he is just so glad to be home again...I know I am. Thank you to all who are emailing us and encouraging us in that way! We would love to be able to write back to everyone but our time is limited. Please know that we do read all of them though! Thank you all for your prayers for Taylor each day...they're working! We love you all, Jen

Hello everyone!

Taylor had a rough day today generally speaking. He cried most of the afternoon. He doesn't seem to be in any pain, yet he gets easily agitated. We realize he doesn't feel good even on the best of days so when you combine that with being in the terrible twos you get a little 25 pound tornado! We also now struggle with him in the area of discipline. We refuse to give in to his every whim, yet it's hard to know where to draw the line with a very sick (and manipulative) toddler. We basically are sticking to what we've been doing before his diagnosis because he will eventually get better and we don't want to end up with a little monster. Children, his age especially, crave routine and want boundaries, so we really need to stick to how we have been handling him in the past. As for Matt and I, we grow closer each day.

Taylor's doctor actually told us that the worst side effect of Taylor's chemotherapy is the toll that it's going to take on our marriage! He told us that something of this magnitude will either make you or break you as individuals and as a couple. At first it was hard and we both seemed as though we were in our own separate whirlwind after we learned of Taylor's illness and got thrown into all the tests, scans and then chemo. It all happened so fast! It really took a few weeks before Matt and I could relax a little about Taylor, get used to our lives as parents of a child with cancer, and remember that we were still married! Communication is what holds us together. This will change us forever. If we can get through this, we can get through just about anything! I just know good will come of this in many different ways.

God can use anything, even tragedy, for His good. Whenever I have low moments or get exasperated with my inconsolable little one I repeat these two verses in my head and I always feel better and can go on. They are, “He gives strength to those who are tired and power to the weak. Those who trust in the Lord will be made strong. They will rise up as an eagle in the sky. They will run and not need rest. They will walk and not become tired." Is. 40:29, 31 The other one is, “For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory that is to be revealed to us in heaven." Rom. 8:18

We love you all, Jen

Taylor had a wonderful day today! All of you guys who prayed after reading about the past couple of really rough days got your prayers answered big time! He played outside on his new big playground Daddy built for him. He had a great time with my mom and dad while Matt and I were able to go to the third service at church. He slept beautifully. It was almost like we had our Taylor back for a day!!! Dave and Michelle, who are awesome friends of ours, came over this evening with their little girl. Lauren is Taylor's girlfriend and we, as parents, are planning their wedding already, whether they like it or not! Taylor just had such a good time with her and it was so great for Matt and I to see our little boy enjoying life again, even if for one day. We hope for more days like this one. Thanks to all who lift us up to Him daily. We love you all, Jen

Taylor had another great day today. Thank You to all those who participated in the Car Wash fund drive. It was a big success. We love you all, Jen

Taylor and I just returned home from day 1 of round 3. He did well! He was in good spirits and also had a good eating day too. Dr. Meyers, the other doctor on the sarcoma team at MSK, said "WOW" in response to examining Taylor's leg! He also said that he may not require as much, if any, radiation after his surgery since the chemo has really done a number on his tumor. Prayers are really being answered!!! Please pray specifically for Taylor's general health over the next few days as the affects of the chemo begin to take their toll on his body.

We would like to thank everyone who participated in the car wash fund drive this past weekend! Thank you to all of you who have generously contributed to help with the daily expenses of Taylor's treatment. Thank you also, to all those who have given Taylor gifts and who have been bringing us meals. The love and support we have been receiving is overwhelming and Matt and I appreciate it so much! You all have a part in helping us through this time and making it easier for us! We wish we could thank you all individually! We love you all, Jen

Hello everyone. Taylor didn't have such a great day today. During chemo, he gets a steroid called Decadron. It makes him absolutely crazy, angry, wild, and out of control! I was talking to some of the other moms who have older kids and they say their kids complain that it fills them with rage and also weepiness. Taylor's doctor said later in the day that he no longer needs it for his tumor and he can stop getting it from now on. It wasn't as bad in the last two rounds as it was for this one, and they can't explain why. He was given an anti-anxiety medication to calm him down but he still screamed on the top of his lungs for half the morning and most of the afternoon. He only weighs 24.9 pounds and he may appear as weak as ever, but it took all my strength to hold him down to keep him from throwing himself off the bed! It's horrible to see your little baby in that state. I just kept telling myself that this is temporary, it WILL wear off, and it's all part of this horrifying, yet wonderful package to get my son well!

Tomorrow we go in for his last day of round three. He will only be getting hydrated and mesna to protect his bladder from the chemo tomorrow, which is what he gets 24 hours a day these three days, so hopfully it will be a calmer day. His leg looks awesome!!! There is only a very subtle bulge on the back of his thigh which contains blood left from the injury, and even that's getting smaller by the day! I said to Matt tonight as we put Taylor to bed that I no longer dread changing my own son's diaper or giving him a bath. I know that sounds horrible to say, but his leg was so scary looking and for so long a mystery. I actually felt better about it after we found out it was a tumor because it finally had an identity...and a solution to go along with it. Now, strangely, I look forward to diaper changes and baths because I can daily witness a visible example of God's awesome work in my life...in my little boy!

Please keep him in your prayers as his counts will soon lower and then bottom out to 0.0 again in the days to come. We love you all, Jen

Hi everybody. Taylor had an awesome day today! He was so calm and comfortable. He spent a lot of time in the playroom in the PDH. He also finally took a good nap there! He never sleeps long while getting chemo. What a difference from yesterday! His nurse told me that two is probably the worst age to go through this. Being a "terrible two" is hard enough for a healthy child, now fill them with toxic chemicals and see what you get! He also has a hard time verbalizing what is bothering him. He has no problem saying "NO!" or "ats go home MaMa" all day long. I'm getting pretty good at reading him though and identifying what's wrong. Very quickly I've gone from teacher to mother/nurse. I give him shots at home each night, change his broviac dressing three times a week and clean the site, change his caps on his lines and inject them with Heparin, as well as keep track of the five medications he gets at home. Seven weeks ago I had no idea what a broviac or Heparin even were! ( The broviac is the tube that goes into the main vein in his heart and wraps up around his collar bone and comes out of his chest so that he can receive chemo, hydration, medication, and have blood extracted without having to stick him every time.) I thought I was a busy mom before Taylor's diagnosis! Caring for him is more than a full time job right now but God is seeing us through each day.

I told my mom today that I feel like nothing I do these days is normal. Instead of worrying about colds and going to playgroups we worry about white counts and going to chemo. It's a very different life from what I've known. What I have learned in almost 32 years here in this world is that nothing stays the same and this too shall pass. Matt and I thank all of you who have sent us words of encouragement and often your own experiences with trials. They have been a blessing to us and always lift our hopes a spirits. For Taylor, Matt, and I, our lives WILL go back to normal but we will be forever changed by this experience and we'll never forget how so many of you reached out to us in so many different ways and lifted us up daily to the Lord in prayer. We love you all, Jen

Hello. Taylor had a great day today! He was in good spirits and seemed comfortable. Taylor received blood yesterday so his color is good and he's feeling more energetic. As of yesterday, Taylor has received six blood transfusions and three platelet transfusions. He has not been eating well the past two days. He did drink several cans of Pediasure yesterday and only a few today. We're just enjoying each moment of each day that passes because we may need to leave for the hospital at any time now. It's almost like waiting to go into labor! We're hoping his fever will hold off until at least Tuesday this time. Please pray that he eats and drinks better tomorrow. He loves milkshakes so we are going to try and make one with chocolate Pediasure and vanilla ice cream.

So far, since we began six weeks ago, we have spent fifteen days on the outpatient floor (getting chemo, blood work, tests, etc.) and twenty-five days and nights admitted on the inpatient floor (for fevers while neutropenic and post procedure recovery). They make it so nice for the children there though. There is a whole staff called Child Life, who plans each day for the kids, whether inpatient or outpatient. There are age appropriate activities that go on all day long in the playrooms such as games, crafts, and play time. Taylor and I often play bingo on Monday nights and the children all receive a brand new toy for a prize at the end of the game whether they win or not! Clowns, magicians, musicians and a movement therapist (music and dance) visit weekly. There is always something going on for the kids and the staff really loves these children!

Matt and I are so impressed with this hospital! It's really world class! Dr. Wexler and Dr. Meyers are so sweet and you can tell they love what they do. I just wish Taylor would stop throwing his toy cars at them every time they come near him! We feel so blessed to live so close to this place and its amazing doctors! There are people being treated there from all over the world! God is awesome and this gives new and special meaning to "He always provides." We love you all, Jen

Hello! We are still home and Taylor had a wonderful weekend! It seems like everytime I tell all of you about an issue we are having with Taylor, the next day things are fine! Taylor was not eating or drinking well the other day. In fact, we started him back on the feeding tube pump at night so he can make up what he didn't drink during the day. I mentioned it on our web site and now he's eating and drinking just fine! Now that's the power of prayer! Thank you everyone! We love you all, Jen

Horray...we're still home! He still has no fever! We have more great news. When you look at both of Taylor's legs from any angle, you absolutely cannot tell which leg has the tumor!!! The little bulge of blood that was left over from the initial injury has now reabsorbed into his body! Remember...his leg looked like there was a softball in it only 8 weeks ago! What an answer to prayer! We still have a long road ahead with surgery and maintenance chemo, but we have just come so far in only the first 2 months...it's amazing! He is moody, but feeling good and eating about 8-10 Go-gurts a day. Yes...we finally found the food of Taylor's choice and it's yogurt. At least for now it is. We were told that kids on chemo usually desire one thing to eat and eat it obsessivly. We are just so glad he's eating and it happens to be something nutritious and it slides down easily when he has mouth sores! God is so good! We love you all, Jen

Just a quick note. Please pray for Taylor as his mouth sores have started to come in that he will be as comfortable as possible. He was very upset this morning. He was constantly crying. Please pray for a pleasant day as Jen and her mom take him in to the city for one of his maintenance rounds of chemo today. Thnk you so much for your continued prayers. Matt

Well everyone, we are back in the hospital again. Twice today actually. We came in this morning for counts and his one weekly dose of chemo and got home around 3:00 pm. Wouldn't you know it, at 3:30 he had a fever. We were back at Sloan Kettering again by 6:00 pm. I'm glad though in a way. Taylor's WBC count is at 0.0 today and he is feeling horrible. His mouth sores are starting to come back and he hasn't eaten all day. He'll be on the G-tube (feeding tube) pump 24 hours a day now until we go home next week. He goes from being a happy child to a critically ill child overnight, literally, after these four rounds of massive chemo! We're so glad he only has one more big round to go. We are told it's much easier after that when they just get maintenance chemo. Matt and I were saying that we'll think twice before we complain about a little pain we have somewhere or are bothered by cold symptoms from now on. We watch our little angel and the other tiny ones go through unbelievable bodily hardship every day! For many of them it lasts for a year or more! We are told that these little ones go on to be strong people. They go far and do big things in life because they say in their minds, I endured and conquered cancer when I was only two years old, I can do anything!

This morning Matt and I woke to the sound of our son's little voice talking quietly in his crib. This is not normal in our house. For the past two months he's awakened crying almost every day for whatever reason. Matt asked, Who is he talking to? I answered half jokingly, May be his guardian angel? It made me think about that though. Angels are ministering spirits to us, especially in time of physical and emotional need. I wonder if Taylor is somehow comforted by them in some special way, as only a 2 year old can be. I can only hope and pray that he is feeling that same strength, peace, and comfort his Daddy and I receive from the Lord and His invisible army of servants each and every day through this horrible ordeal.

Please pray that Taylor will be feeling better and better each day as we wait for his counts to rise. Thanks everyone! We love you all, Jen

Hi All. Please pray for Taylor. He has to go in for surgery tomorrow. Tonight around 7:15 his Broviac came out of his chest. A Broviac is the tube that goes into his chest and into the vein right above his heart. This tube is what all of his blood is drawn with and what all of his antibiotics go into. The main issue is that his blood counts are low and there are no white blood cells to fight of infection. This is normally only a 25 min surgery and then he is done. Please pray that all goes well with that. When it first happened, Jen blacked out for a few seconds as well. There was a bit of blood around. The doctors have assured us that this type of thing has happened before and is not uncommon especially for someone his age. There was one small girl that even pulled hers out and was running around the house with it. There is also a small concern that his stomach tube might be seeping as well. Hopefully they can take care of that in the surgery at the same time.

With all this, there is much to thank our good Lord for. First, this happened at Sloan right in front of a nurse. Only the Lord could plan it that way. This is something that is not uncommon and there is no permanent damage from this happening. God is so good. I am so glad that He is in control of everything. Thanks everyone for all your prayers. Matt

Hello everyone. Matt let you all know what happened with Taylor here yesterday. There were a few scary moments, that’s for sure. Taylor is still broviac-less at this time. He will go into surgery to have another one put in later next week after his counts and platelets go back up. Without platelets he could bleed during surgery. Fortunately, Taylor felt no pain when his line fell out. His line never closed around the opening. This is why it didn’t stay in. However, he didn’t care too much for everyone crowding around him and touching him when they were trying to stop the bleeding and bandage him up. Praise the Lord that this didn’t happen when we were at home!!! Today I was told about children that actually pull theirs out or cut them off! Other than last nights little adventure, Taylor is doing well. He still has a mild fever on and off throughout the day. He is not eating or drinking but he’s getting Pediasure through his feeding tube 24 hours a day. He is calm, quiet, and comfortable.

Dr. Wexler came in yesterday morning and told me that the chemo worked fantastic on the tumor! He could feel what’s left of his shrunken tumor way down in his thigh. Taylor’s surgery will be scheduled for the first week of September! Hooray!!!! Taylor will be given his last big round on August 12-14. He’ll get a couple of weeks off so his counts can really rebound before the surgery. After the surgery, the worst of this will be over. Life for us right now is really rough, but I feel like we’re sailing right on through on the wings of all your prayers. The lord even throws me a little heavenly valium when things are really hairy (like last night!) Honestly, I feel His strength every day. I can’t explain how else I’m getting though this nightmare. Please keep Taylor in you prayers for ultimate healing and that he would be able to continue on with lots of physical and emotional strength. We love you all, Jen